


Blind

by inabodycastofglass



Series: Old works [7]
Category: Tales of the Abyss
Genre: F/M, Natalia goes blind, Post Game
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-17
Updated: 2016-07-17
Packaged: 2018-07-24 14:31:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7511897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inabodycastofglass/pseuds/inabodycastofglass
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Natalia is twenty-one, she wakes up with her sight gone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blind

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this back in 2011. It's been slightly edited. It also used to be a multi-chapter story.

Natalia opened her eyes, but saw nothing other than an odd blackish-redish-purplish-bluish colour. She touched her face to make sure there wasn’t something laid over it that she just hadn’t noticed. Her fingers touched skin and lashes.

She stood up, nearly stumbling off of the bed that she was laying on, and fumbled her way to the door, knocking something off of something else. The crash as whatever it was landed on the ground and broke throbbed in her ears. She tried taking another step but gasped at the broken ceramic whatever slicing open the arch of her foot and causing her to stumble toward the ground.

Someone opened the door, footsteps quick. She looked to the source of the sound, tears on her face, almost numb from panic. “Who’s there?”

“Natalia?”

It was Luke. She tried to stand up and reach for him. She stumbled again, but he caught her, holding her up. The foot that was cut screamed it’s way up her leg. She gripped at his arms. “Luke? Luke, I can’t see!”

* * *

It was only a matter of weeks before everyone in Kimlasca knew of Natalia’s new condition. The reviews were mixed. Some wondered how a blind princess could rule. Others felt her struggle would help her grow as a person and a ruler. Over all, no one would ever see her the same again. And she would never see again period.

Luke was the first to adjust. when she came over he would take her by the arm and lead her around, informing her of everything that was happening. Slowly through his stories she began to get a visual of everything around her, though it never looked exactly the same as it did before. Everyone was more vibrant, colours changed and mixed, and everyone’s actions were different. Colours emanated from people like aura’s, and everyone had a different one. Asch was red in her memories. Luke was orange. Tear was a light purple, Anise darker. Jade was a green. Emperor Peony was yellow. She herself was a soft pink. And Guy… she hadn’t seen Guy.

She knew though, that he was avoiding her so they wouldn’t have to touch. She had to touch everything to see. Though she had found her ears could distinguish small differences in a person’s voice, pick up on footsteps outside of her room, and hear whispers she previously couldn’t. She had even figured out how to walk around every inch of the castle and it’s gardens by counting the steps she took from one place to another. She could manage perfectly fine on her own, just the way she preferred it.

The doctor still insisted there was a high possibility that it was just a temporary blindness. But she didn’t hold onto the hope. Somewhere deep down she knew it wasn’t. This was the way she was now, and no amount of hoping could change that.

* * *

A year and a month passed before King Ingobert permitted Natalia her full responsibilities again.

The first thing she did was travel to Grand Chokmah to meet with Peony to discuss matters of their military boats on neutral seas, as well as the ever increasing threat of pirates.

Peony had met her at the door and took her by the arm to lead her to the meeting room. As much as she appreciated it, she wondered if it was just a way to “have a pretty girl on his arm”. She scolded herself for this thought. Peony was the man most capable of caring that she’d ever met, even if he often acted on the contrary.

He sat her down at one end of the large table, being the main representation of the kingdom of Kimlasca-Lanvaldear, and took his seat at the other end. As they proceeded she noticed the colour green and many various shades of gray, people who had played too little part in her life to get a sense of their colour.

She was attracted to the colour blue, flaring bright on the side of the Malkuth nobles. It took only a moment longer to place the voice. Guy was speaking. She was both relieved to find he was okay, and terribly dejected to know that he hadn’t cared enough to bother greeting her. She hoped that he had come in later and hadn’t had the time before the meeting. As a newly reappointed noble, he did not want to make a poor impression.

After the meeting ended Peony was back at her side, helping her to her feet. “Ready to go, Princess?”

She smiled politely. “I was actually hoping to speak with Guy.”

He hesitated. “Ah.” Natalia could tell from that one sound that something was wrong, though she didn’t want to hazard a guess. “He’salready left.”

“Oh.” Oh… “That’s all right.” She felt nauseous. “Perhaps another time then.” Perhaps she would show up at his room later that night and demand he explain himself. Being a princess she still had that power over him. But she wondered if it was the right thing to do. He must have been avoiding her for a reason. He was Guy, always kind and gentle and polite with women. He wasn’t the type to run away from his problems. Well, most of them.

Still, if she missed this chance, another one might not come up so easily or so soon. It may not come up at all, and then she and Guy would drift apart for good. She didn’t wish for that at all. Now that Asch was gone, she trusted Guy more than anyone else she knew. If she lost him…

It was decided. She asked Peony where he was rooming and she received a hearty laugh in reply.

“If you would like, I can direct you there after dinner.”

She didn’t care that he was doing so for his own amusement, she appreciated his help nonetheless. And she told him exactly that.

* * *

At precisely ten o'clock Natalia rapped her knuckles on the wood in front of her. The doors were the only parts of the castle that were wood, she noted. She could use that fact to help her move around more easily by herself. “Are you going to watch?”

She heard the ruffling of clothes, indicating that Peony had shrugged. “I just want to make sure you’re safe getting back.”

She chuckled. He couldn’t come up with a better response? She didn’t have time to ask, since the door opened, revealing a blue glow. “Yes-” The figure froze upon seeing her.

She pushed her way past him and into his room, noticing him jumping aside but dismissing it as a usual response from him. She felt around for a bed or chair to sit on, hearing him gasp when she bumped her knee on the corner of a chest or something else that rose only two feet from the floor. She decided to sit on that item, carefully at first to be sure it wouldn’t collapse.

Crossing her legs she looked at the spot emitting the blue glow. “Guy, I have come for a few words.” When he didn’t respond she continued, hoping she wasn’t speaking to thin air. She didn’t think Guy would run from her like that, but she also couldn’t be sure. “May I ask why you ignored me so blatantly at the meeting.”

There was a long wait while she feared Guy really had run off, the shock affecting her more than she believed it should. She gripped her skirt to stop her hands from shaking, gripping it tighter and tighter as her body’s reaction won out until she was twisting the fabric tightly around her knuckles. They froze with her breath when a voice finally answered.

“I’m sorry. I just…” There was a strain in Guy’s voice, like he was trying to keep it back. What didn’t he want to tell her? The minutes that followed were too silent. Her ears started to ring. She started to see the room, exactly like her own, but stretched out like reading a children’s book, and the colours were vibrant and unrealistic, especially for guys tastes. It was shattered suddenly by a loud bang, making her jump. Guy had punched her mirror world just like he’d punched the table or the wall, shattering it. “Damnit!”

She stared in his direction, open mouthed. “Guy-”

“Why did you come here?”

She couldn’t answer. Because she thought it right. Because she wanted an explanation, an apology. Because she wanted to preserve their friendship. Because she cared about him.

“Because I am scared.” Her throat burned. “Because- because I lost my sight, and now everyone is acting differently. Luke has become overly nice, Tear is only soft spoken around me, Anise has stopped teasing me, Jade is never sarcastic anymore, father has someone escorting me at all times, and you have refused to see me all together. I thought-” She swallowed. It was like all the liquid that was suppose to be in her mouth and instead moved to her eyes. “I thought you would be the only one to treat me the same. I thought you would still reach out you hand to help me, pulling it away at the last moment. I thought you would still explain things when someone was playing a trick on me. I thought you would offer to escort me around town while you were visiting or while I was visiting you. I thought you would still call me princess, and laugh when I scolded you for being too formal.”

She stared down at her hands, dead. No pink fluttered from her fingertips. “I am no longer Natalia. Just a princess. A title without a name. It feels like I’ve lost my identity as well as my sight and my friends.”

Hands wrapped around hers, shaking. The feeling sent a shock up her arms, stopping just under her eyes. The weight was more than possible. It felt like her hands were being crushed under the force that his touch brought. But it all evaporated when a few tears landed on her wrists.

“I’m sorry.” Something about the way he said those words made her chest flutter like a nest of birds escaped from inside it. “It’s all my fault this happened.” She looked directly in front of her, though she knew he wasn’t in that direction. He was crying in her lap like a small child who had just woken from a nightmare, seeking comfort from his mother.

She didn’t like this image of him. He was always the strong one, the one looking forward and moving on. Even with his gynophobia he was the strong one. She wanted that image of him back. The one facing the sun, shoulders back, hands on his hips, feet evenly spaced, the light casting a halo from where she stood behind, looking up at him.

“I saw the monster coming at you. My voice wouldn’t work. If only I could have grabbed you and pulled you away, it wouldn’t have hit you.” He squeezed her hands and she was no longer sure if they were shaking from grief or fear, or even what kind of fear he was feeling. “That arte, I’d never seen it before. But when it hit you, right in the eyes, you didn’t scream or anything, you just collapsed. I couldn’t even carry you to safety like I’d done before, I was too scared. I just stood there until I could call for help. If Tear hadn’t heard me, you might even be-” His voice cracked. “-dead.”

She hadn’t thought about everyone else. She hadn’t thought that someone else might be suffering. She had been so preoccupied with her own pain, her alienation, that she hadn’t considered that the others might not know how to respond.

She placed her hands on both his cheeks, brushing her thumbs lightly across his tears. Slowly she raised him close to her face, his shaking getting worse, but she ignored it for now. Slowly, ever so slowly, she placed her lips to his, forgiving him for the past year. Releasing his guilt for causing her blindness. And just as slowly she pulled away.

He slipped a hand behind her neck, pulling her back in. Again he apologised. Apologised for his fear and apologised for abandoning her. He apologised deep and long, long enough to stop shaking and long enough for her to slip her arms around him.

Finally they fell apart, all the apologising and forgiving done, and they both breathed deeply. Natalia felt incredibly warm, the back of her neck burning, her blood rushing to the odd sensation of forgiveness. Just above her, their lips still brushing, he whispered, “Natalia,” and she smiled. He had given her back her identity with that one breath of warm air.

* * *

It became natural over the next few months. Guy showed up at the castle in Baticul and she went to visit him. He took to leading her around by the hand. Of course, once they stopped he would snatch his hand away, shaking violently. But within two steps he always had her hand in his once again.

She told herself it was because he still felt guilty, so she didn’t let it get to her very often, but there were times where she felt she was being treated like a child. Still, with every passing day they spent together, he shook a little less and held on a little longer, unnoticeable to anyone who could see, including him. And with every added millisecond that their hands were joined, a little tingle of electricity traveled up her arm a little more, not as strong as their first night, but strong enough.

Luke was the first to notice they were holding hands when he went to take hers and she held out the opposite. He made a big grand gesture and Guy pulled away, only taking it again when Luke calmed down and looked away.

Tear was next, being with Luke quite frequently. All she did was smile and whisper “congratulations” and left it at that. But Natalia could swear Tear was always smiling at her.

Anise and Jade noticed next. The two took to teasing them whenever they were within ear shot. When this happened, and Guy let go, Tear, Luke, or Jade would take her hand to lead her around unknown territory, as Anise got too excited and started to run, despite being seventeen by then.

Peony only cat whistled and claimed he “called it”, though sometimes he would take to humming love songs under his breath. No one could really tell if that was because of them, or because he was just Peony.

It was on the eve of her twenty-third birthday that he didn’t let go. When she went to dress herself for bed she felt him grip just slightly. She turned around, seeing his blue flared up. He was shaking again for the first time in a very long time, and the hurricane in the bottom of her stomach told her why.

Slowly, oh so very slowly, he stepped into her, his fingers lacing with hers. Placing his other hand on her jaw, he tilted it up and she became aware for the first time just how tall those six inches were.

His lips touched hers, brushing at first, just leaving a tingle behind, and a cloud of butterflies in her stomach. Still it left her breathing deep and her heart beating fast. When he kissed her again her body felt thick. Her heart felt like it was beating through the Inista Marsh, but it never slowed its pace. Her butterflies grew into birds ripping at her stomach, trying to get free. Her entire world disappeared and they just fell.

She felt the sudden sensation of soft feathers, making her think the birds in her stomach escaped. She looked up at him, full body above hers, shaking with nervousness, shyness, anticipation, and fear that had nothing to do with his gynophobia. Pink rose into blue and evaporated into light purple. Fingers ran up and down her sides, leaving trails of tingles and shocks. They traced the lines of her stomach, which had become less firm since her accident, running across her abdomen and to her rib cage, tracing the indents around every bone.

Her own traced his jaw, feeling every crevice of his ears, and following them to his eyes. They brushed across his eyelashes, and traced the bags underneath. She felt his lips, so soft and thin. A perfect image was created in her mind, the first one since she had last seen him. She hadn’t realized how much he’d matured. He was twenty-six now, a full grown man.

His blue filled her vision and she closed her eyes. Slowly she felt a small pressure on her right eye, and her chest felt hot, and then the same pressure on her left and she was melting into her bed. Slowly he ran two fingers across her eye and she realized for the first time she had a scar.

“You are beautiful.”

He brushed away the tears those words brought and kissed her again. He kissed her kindly, he kissed her lovingly, he kissed her beautifully. And she loved him too.


End file.
